Monday, 4 January 2016, 3:30 pm
In 2015, I had to come out from my shell and meet new people from very different walks of life. I'm no longer surrounded by like-minded people as I was during college. It was difficult to adjust to the conditions that are prevalent in my uni, where a person's value is measured by how he/she looks, and the brands of the clothes and the bags that he/she has on. It was really tiring to constantly hear all the fat shaming, people talking about who was well off and who wasn't, who has a Chanel bag and who doesn't. From this, I realised how lucky I was to have met the friends that I did prior to this, who kept me so sheltered that I actually experienced a culture shock when I faced the real world hahah. Nonetheless, I am grateful to have met the people that I did because I now understand that people from different walks of life see from very different perspectives, none which are superior to another.
One of the things that really made a huge impact on me in 2015 was being part of my uni's Community Service Initiative (CSI). I've only attended three of their activities (one of them being a BBQ party lol) but the impact that they left on me is so strong. Through CSI, I got the great opportunity to meet people from other courses, some of whom are the most selfless people I have ever met in my life. CSI was really a place where I felt that people dropped their pride and ego. It was very heartwarming to see how the volunteers were so ready to do the dirty work like taking out someone else's trash without even giving it a second thought. When we visited an orphanage, it was very heartwarming that the whole group of around 20 volunteers all so willingly stepped barefoot onto the filthy, wet floor without a single complaint. Being around such wonderful people really made me learn to burn down my inflated sense of self that I was too good to do certain things (like cleaning up after someone else). Basically, being a part of CSI, and being around the wonderful people there, really makes you realise how small we are and makes you want to be a better person.
One of the biggest decisions that I had to make in 2015 was my decision to enter law school. It's true that I had a lot of doubts for many reasons, the main one being that I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to cope especially since law was actually my weakest A level subject. I'm doing a lot better now than I've ever been so I'm happy that I'm making progress and improvement. I'm really glad that I didn't let one bad grade deter me from doing what I've been aiming for all my life. Having said that, starting uni in 2015 also really gave me a taste of true hardship. In my first year, I got a taste of how it feels to feel tired of being tired. The joy of handing in one assignment is undermined by the fear of how close the deadline is for the next one. Reaching uni at 7am and reaching home close to 1am, knowing that I still had another pile of work to complete. I know that these struggles are petty and that many others had it worse than I did. Amidst all that I am really grateful for all that I have and that I didn't have to juggle studying with working part time.
I know that I failed miserably at keeping this space alive in 2015 and I'm actually really sad that I didn't get to document all the meaningful things that really shaped me into who I am today. Nonetheless, here is my summary of some of the major things that happened in 2015!
2016 had a really interesting start cos I fell sick on the 1st of Jan LOL! My #1 resolution for this year is to finally get my friggin' driving license (I've been putting it off for like 3 years now because I cannot deal with the horrible system). This year, I will also have to decide if I want to transfer to the UK and also the uni that I want to transfer to. It's a really big decision to make and it's scary. Right now I'm focusing on my Lexicon article so I will start deciding when my semester 2 results are released at the end of January. Nonetheless, I really hope that if I have the means to, I will not let my fear of being so far away take over and decide not to take that chance. I know that getting to transfer is a wonderful opportunity for me because I will get to learn more about other cultures, and also because being in a uni with a bigger law school will be able to offer me a lot more in terms of electives. Having said that, I'm really scared because I've never even been outside of Asia ever since I was a kid, never mind having to live so far away alone sighs.
Moving onto less serious matters, I'm very excited for 2016 especially since I have a lot of exciting things planned!! I'll be going to Japan towards the end of February, sah excites! See you guys in my next post, and have a wonderful new year everyone! ♥
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